Sunday, December 13, 2009

A Quick Application of Perspective

In the background: "Blue Eyes" - Cary Brothers.

I feel warm, uncomfortably numb. Useless. Been studying all day. Still wanting that one piece of me that's missing. Gave it some thought though, I'm not dying, in jail, or anything. I've really got nothing to worry about. Except for my education... I need a vacation. Finals is in full swing, and lucky for me I have so much yet to do its infuriating. I don't know if its because of the illness, but I've been depressed again. Slept for an incredible 13 hours last night for no reason. What do you do when life's kicking your ass?

I don't know. Keep plugging away, that's what the shiny optimist would say. You'll do great! Work hard! Yeah, okay, lets' do that!

I need a nap. Maybe caffeine? Lets try that option.

In other news, I leave back home for a week. Where I can come back to some possible familial stability. We'll see what happens, knowing how this week is going, I can look forward to a broken head due to finals. I don't understand how people can get by or justify themselves with average grades. I guess I should ask myself that question, I never prepare enough for the occasion at hand, and on the occasion that I do, I still get rocked. I don't know what this means, but it begs the question: Whats the point of studying?

Enter the Bi-Polar, the soft implication of yourself. Which side is right? Does it even matter? What does this have to do with becoming a doctor? Absolutely nothing, lets get that going. Here I come Standford Med. Its game time.

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